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Over the last few months I have been helping several clients prepare for interviews. Some have now landed in new jobs, despite the economy and their fears borne of long-term unemployment. In all cases, preparing for the interview required what my husband (one of my early victims who was successful in landing a new job) calls torture.   It’s a painful process of preparing and practicing – the latter by being subjected to unrelenting grilling. Though I try to be kind through this process, it is far more important that I be honest. If the client does not hear my critique and is thus able to adjust the way she explains her experience, then it is likely she will not hear from the interviewer – read: get the job. It is not fun or pleasant to give or receive critical feedback; however, most people tell me that our sessions made them feel more confident and prepared for any questions that the interviewers threw at them. Previously I shared PASS, my proposed mnemonic for successful interviews: Preparation, Authenticity, STAR stories and Sustained Energy and Presence.   To these I would now like to add Five Essential Skills:

  • Demonstrating Confidence
  • Listening
  • Making a powerful connection
  • Asking questions that get meaningful answers
  • Storytelling
When I started writing this blog I thought I would tackle each of these topics briefly.   I found myself writing several paragraphs on each topic and sensing that there was still much to cover. As a result, I will present one today and the rest in subsequent blog posts. The first skill, Demonstrating Confidence, does not mean acting with arrogance or superiority.   In particular, a confident job candidate will be authentic and respectful in all interactions. The interview begins when you answer the phone, first step into the building, drive into the parking lot or even when you deal with someone making arrangements for your visit.   I have heard many stories of candidates who were rejected because of their lack of respect for the receptionist, assistant or intern who helped them.   Just because they are not on the list, does not mean they are not interviewing you. Your grooming and dress, your posture and handshake, and your demeanor and the tone of your voice demonstrate confidence.   Let’s look at each of these separately. Dress and Grooming: You should dress in a way that you feel comfortable and that helps you show you fit in.   Even in the age of business casual it is still appropriate to wear a suit to an interview.   For men this is easy, and the only guidance is that the tie should not be outlandish. Stay away from the hula girl tie you bought on vacation. For women, either a skirt (of appropriate length) or pantsuit in a neutral tone is terrific, paired with a contrasting blouse or sweater.   Your make up and hair should be appropriate for the time of day. Do not overdo the jewelry or perfume, and if you can’t walk in those high pumps, then don’t wear them. Posture and Handshake:  Remember when your mother told you not to slouch? Standing and sitting up straight not only helps you be perceived as confident, but it also helps you project your voice and helps you maintain your energy. When you slouch your voice naturally softens and you look uncomfortable, defeated and, probably, out of place. When you are seated citrate salt of sildenafil, lean slightly forward, and use your hands for emphasis rather than keep them stiffly at your sides.   And definitely, do not cross your arms – a defensive posture. When you first meet someone, offer your hand with a firm, but not an exaggerated grip.   Think about how you might hold a golf club or a tennis racket: you don’t want to let it go, but holding it too tight will cause all your shots to go awry or give you elbow pain. Demeanor: A self-assured person does not scowl or look fearful.   Instead, a confident person is able to smile when greeting others and during a conversation.   Now, that does not mean that you should fake your smile.   That would not be authentic; instead, relax and your facial muscles will relax.   If you can, take a few deep, relaxing breaths before you walk into the interview or when you have a bathroom break.   When you speak with someone, citrate salt of sildenafil hold their gaze and follow their eyes.   This will help you listen as well. Nod slightly to indicate you are listening but do not exaggerate. Voice and expression:  Practice [citrate salt of sildenafil] will help you avoid many of the verbal crutches we use when we are nervous, such as “hmm”, “uh” and “you know. ” Many people have adopted what is often referred to as “up-talk”, the change in tone at the end that turns declarative sentences into apparent questions.   When women in particular use “up-talk” they appear uncertain about what they are saying. Listen hard for whether you use this nasty habit, and work to avoid it, especially in an interview.   Speak neither too softly nor too loud, but modulate your voice to avoid speaking in a monotone.   It is OK to express warmth and excitement. Though humor can help break the ice or overcome an embarrassing moment, be careful how you use it: if you are not naturally funny don’t force it.   For heaven’s sakes, don’t make jokes especially at the expense of anyone or any group. Practice is the best way to learn how you present yourself. Use a camera to record your behavior in a mock interview or ask a coach or trusted friend to help you. Citrate salt of sildenafil (if you’d like my help preparing for interviews, i have a special offer of three sessions) an interview is a stressful situation and, though most interviewers will cut you some slack, you can truly “ace the interview” by presenting your most confident best self.

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